The funny pod cars

The funny pod cars are designed to be environmentally friendly and supposedly people consider them to be "cute," yeah right. I'm not sure if anyone has seen Jeff Dunham the comedian, but he does a sketch with some puppets, and one is concerning his wife's car. His wife drives a Toyota Prius, and Jeff drives an original H1 Hummer, and when gas was really high he drove her car too. His puppet makes the joke that when a man drives down the street in a prius all anyone hears is the sound "i'm gaaaaaaayyyyyyy" instead of the small cars usual wine. Now I've been seeing a lot of funny pod cars come out recently, so I've made my own joke, not only is their top speed just about 45 mph but you hear this when they drive by "i was born a human, but ultimately decided to live life as a fairy." "Go figure." Instead of its usual wine.




I call them funny pod cars because one of them is actually referred to as the Chrysler GEM PeaPod (ha), "hey look I'm driving around in a peapod, next I will sprout a growth from my tires!" What is a GEM PeaPod? well its a . . . I'm not sure, but i will include some pictures of these interesting vehicles, while the names of the others will be provided if you feel so inclined to look up the pictures yourself, you know feed your curiosity. (if you can call them that)(vehicles, i mean, because they sure are interesting. . . looking.)



These cars are funny because they at most could hold one and a half regular sized people, or one football player. What they seem to be originally designed for are four smaller sized people, or a fraggle of faeries (which i estimate to be about 100 at max). And not only do these cars not hold very much but they look RIDICULOUS seriously some of these cars are just a big funny looking joke. Yes, i get that they are mostly concepts and are supposed to look futuristic, but come on people whose going to drive something that looks like a big blue bouncy ball that sprouted tires, it un-natural, and un-ethical, and dumb.




Example: You drive into work one day in the near future and park next to your friends new mood car (idea from previous blog post) even though it shows that he's sad, he brightens up the moment he sees your car. The big blue bouncy ball that sprouted tires, changes his expression from gloomy to ROTPL rolling on the pavement laughing. Then when he asks you what it is you reply well it is environmentally friendly, like that will make up for that fact that you just climbed out of a clown car. Except nobody crawled out behind you, continually proving that only faeries, not clowns or humans can fit comfortably into the bubble car. Some of these funny pod cars are so insane that they only have one door that opens to the front of the vehicle, some even have just three tires (isn't that a tricycle, not a car).




Here is the list of shame, the list of funny pod cars, the list of the big maybe blue bouncy ball cars. So far as i can tell anyways.



----------Chrysler GEM Peapod (pictured above)

• Ford Ka



• Toyota iQ, Rin, Hi-CT



• Suzuki Alto



• Renault ZE Concept



• Nissan Nuru concept, Pivo 2 (pictured above, below the first), Mixim



• Honda Puyo



• Subaru G4e concept



• Chevy Beat, Matiz



• SEAT Tribu



• Mazda Kiyora concept

Did you notice that its not just the Japanese making these cars anymore?

She's sad, I could make her happy.

The Aston Martin car company has a new vehicle, so new that there are a limited amount of pictures to found of it, the ones i can find are breath-taking. Aston Martin is famous for making the amazing Vanquish, Vantage, Volante and the DBS editions that everyone sees in the super cool Bond, James Bond movies. Now while looking at their new car anyone comparing it the the ones mentioned above can see where its gets some of its designs, but then again some of them are new and different from the older models. Last time i checked the site where i get my pics from they had three which included deep shadow effects cloaking most of the car from view. Now they have seven images, and the new four you can see the actual car, and holy crap.

The new car is called the Aston Martin One-77 project, and it was originally purposed in august of 2008. It will be officially begin production in the fourth quarter of 2009, and be called a 2010 car. It comes with a version of an engine they have used before a V-12, only this one is new, it has 7.3 liters. It will have a complete carbon-fiber body to help with Aero-dynamics and weight, top speed excess of 200 mph. As can be expected by the name they will only make 77 models, and each one will be individually numbered and delivers start end of 2009, so I assume the orders will be taken before then, so everyone pay attention.

Back to the new noticeable design features of the car, what strikes me the most is the front side cuts, they start at the head lights and continue down to the front bumper of the car. Now they say first impressions are everything, and when i first heard she was coming out i went in search of her picture, and my first reaction to it was. . . why so sad? Because the front side cuts i mentioned, sincerely resemble tear ducks if a car were to have any, it seems as if she's crying. Now side note i know its odd, but i frequently talk to my cars, try to understand their feelings, give them names and so on. (i have a blue Chevy Cavalier named Chip) So if by any miracle i were to own one of these cars i would forever be trying to make her happy. It basically looks like shes going to cry, almost like a basset hound dog, they also have pretty droopy eyes. Maybe instead of changing the whole front end of the car just so the person driving her doesn't feel inclined to be depressed all the time, they could just paint her a happy, cheerful color. I suggest red, yellow, or white, because fun colors like pink, and orange i have found don't seem to take well to Aston Martins. A grayish blue color would look good to.

And if in the future they did decide that this car does look rather sad, well then they could remake the car with some super cool new technology into a mood car. The car's expression changes with that of the drivers. Almost like that movie 'Cars' except the car doesn't drive itself, you drive it and it is an ultimate reflection of your personality. Example drive into work, someone sees you coming and without having to talk to you, can decide to avoid you the rest of the day based on the frown you drove up in. Cool right? I think so. I'd buy one.

I Regress, my heart the cd player

There is an event that happens frequently to me, i think up amazing theories and ideas right before i lose consciousness (when I'm going to sleep). I've taken to keeping my cell phone next to me when I'm going to go to sleep, because with a full texting keyboard its easy to write myself notes, either to blog about later like i am now or to just contemplate when i have free time.

I need to lay the background for this one first before i explain my theory. Otherwise it will just seem as though i'm insane which i am really not, atleast i don't think, I am. When i was a senior in high school my mother convinced me to take Anatomy and Physiology, because she said it would be good to learn about my body and how to better take care of it. And i did learn all of that, along with being better associated with my body. So that now I'm coming at everything it does from a different angle. Almost like an out of body experience, which i think i had when we visited the cadaver lab as a field trip. One of the main points that struck me the most, and now I keep the idea with me always, is the heart. In class we figured out how many beats your heart does in an hour, a day, a week, and even a year. It boggles the mind to think that there is this thing inside of you that you've never seen before, that's keeping you alive, and if your lucky never falters.

When i was falling asleep i was contemplating my heart beat apparently because, i was thinking about how amazing that one muscle in your body really is, It Never Stops. Every second, of every day, of your entire life, it keeps beating. Now things can happen to it, of course they can, heart disease, stoke, and heart attacks (that depending on the severity may require major surgery) to name a few. So in my late night musing i was determining what my heart reminded me of, and this is what i came up with (don't ask-because i don't know) a CD player.

If a CD player is made correctly of out good strong materials it can last for a very long time. Cd players are born much like hearts. CD players are put together in a factory and then sent to a store. While Hearts are put together inside your body by your mothers body, and then sent to the hospital. To ensure that your CD player has a long life it is good to always keep fresh batteries on hand in case it runs out. Along with keeping the inside sensor clean, and the Cd's un-scratched, it should be in good shape. To keep your heart going it is always good to keep fresh blood flowing into the muscle so that its always at full power. Also keeping oxygen and sustenance around is good to.

Now to avoid any mishaps with your CD player it is always good to keep track of it, don't drop it, step on it, or run it over with your car, just basic maintenance stuff. If a person tries successfully to keep their player out of danger zones then it will last considerably longer. With your heart its the same way, take aspirin if need be, don't eat to many fatty foods, watch your blood pressure, and check your cholesterol regularly. Just basically stay out of the danger zones.

But if you do accidentally drop your player and it needs fixing where do you take it, either the store that your got it from, or buy the broken part from the factory. If your heart enters a danger zone and needs to be fixed, you would either go back to the hospital it came from or one like it and they can fix it, or you would have to go back to the source to find the similar missing section.

As once said by the energizer bunny "keep going." If you take care of a CD player the way that everyone should be taking care of their heart, both machines will "keep going" for a very long time.

Believe It or Not: I'm an Automatic

I've been driving for like four years now and I have finally decided to take the time to learn to drive manual, the reason its taken so long is because most of the cars in my family care are automatic. And because i didn't feel like it; honestly. I decided it looked like to much work, some people just take to it like a fish to water, I've taken to it like a fish to corn syrup. So i keep trying and not really failing, because i swear I think I've almost got it. Anyways in the mean time, and just for the hell of it i have been convincing my dad that one day in the near future automatics will rule the world and manuals will be extincted. Which is true, some day it will happen. So my continuing argument against him is that I find sports cars that are automatic, that would normally be manual. His argument is-and its a good one- "that what if someone is dieing and you are the only one that can save them, you must rush them to the hospital, and the only vehicle around is a manual." Now what?




Well in that case i guess i would have to bite the bullet and clumsily drive the herky-jerky manual to the emergency room; trying not to become a road hazard myself. While at the same time dreaming of my future which will some day be saved by one of these beauties. And anyone can feel free to disagree with me on this, but if you are proficient at driving manual and never have had problems learning to drive one, then you have no idea. Granted i am a 100% car enthusiast, and it doesn't look good for me not to know how to drive one, which is why I'm still trying. Remember this though, find something that you have had trouble doing, something you just couldn't learn, something like calculus. Have you ever wished for a better way? Well i have and that's how i feel; and automatics are my better way.



And don't go as far to call me a pansy either, i hear people that drive manual say that to people who prefer automatic. If you still feel so inclined to call me a flower at least make it a good one, like a birds of paradise, a yellow rose, or a lily, these are all good. Just make it a flower that is prettier than a pansy.

So i am in the process of compiling a list. A list of vehicles that will add themselves to my cause, even though most of them are sports cars. This just proves my point even better, if they can do it, so can normal civilian cars. One another really good point is say your a sports car and you need to achieve the best time going from 0-60, so you would want all of that torque and power you generate in one gear to more swiftly to the next with no loss of it. Well if you leave it to a regular guy, just shifting his manual, there will be a great loss, even if you leave it to a professional race-car driver there will be some loss of foreward motion. So how do you solve this problem, well here is a genius idea try building an autiomatic sports car, a car that shifts itself so fast that it loses nothing. A car like the bugatti can do just that, it shifts itself from gear to gear in 8 milliseconds, count them 8, but you can't because their so fast. A race-car driver can't do that, a normal person can't do that, because that 8 milliseconds is faster than a blink of an eye. And if a bugatti can do it then you bet your butt other sports cars will be able to do it to.

So back to the list. One of the good things here is that so far two of the vehicles on the list are two of my favorite cars. Yes ! (you say two of my favorites well that must mean that one of them is the Bugatti, and you guessed right)

1. The Bugatti Veyron can be driven as a manual or an automatic, and it is possible to switch between the two. The manual uses paddle shifters behind the steering wheel, and the automatics shifts its self in 8 milliseconds. Its a seven speed, dual clutch (like semi trucks, ordinary people don't know how to drive these), and a direct-shift gear box.

Side Note: Sequential manuals do have a clutch, but it is only used to start from a stop, the other shifting occurs with paddles, or sticks operated by the driver. That means its not an automatic, but also means that the driver doesn't need to know a H pattern shifter, just how to engage a clutch. Engaging of the clutch is something i can accomplish, so by that fact i am including Sequential Manuals in my list.



2. Bristol Fighter: six-speed manual or four-speed auto.

3. Brabus SLR: five-speed auto with Speed-Shift.

4. Bentley Azure: four-speed auto.

5. Ferrari Superamerica: six-speed sequential auto

6. Ferrari FXX: six-spped sequential manual

7. Maserati MC12: six-speed "Cambiocorsa" sequential manual.

8. Bentley Arnage: four-speed auto.

9. Rolls-Royce Phantom: five-speed auto.

The list is not done yet, i'm still researching and looking through my massive car library of books.

So you say your a soccer mom?

Lets just fantasize for a second that your a newly initiated PTA member and soon to be soccer mom. Lets also say for the sake of argument that you are considerably well off, and spending upwards of $450,000 dollars on a vehicle is not a big stretch for you. So, with a few of your daughters, more well behaved friends and no known way to get them to practice in style what's a mom to do? How. About. A. Four. Door. Lamborghini.

Also for the sake of another argument, if you just feel so inclined to be a single well to do mother, lets just say several males may follow the carpool home from practice.

This is what you ask for when you drive into your local Lamborghini dealership, the Estoque. Another good technicality for me personally involving the Lambo, is how they all have the tendency to look so very similar, well they've changed the mold with this one. Its even long for a Lambo as they say, which means ample leg room for your little soccer players, while still managing to have the leg room up front. They saved enough space for the sports duffel bags in the trunk. That's what I call functionality and style. The interior boasts "Nappa leather" for the young girls delicate skin, perfect for long comfortable trips to . . . away games?

Don't forget every mom's dream to have a little get away power. Maybe a crazed fan or more commonly, a pissed parent from the other team; you won't be disappointed. Next time you take your precious carpool vehicle in for a check up take time to look under the hood with your mechanic and you'll be pleasantly surprised: a 560 horsepower, V-10 engine with a top speed of 190 mph. I'd like to see that mean little girl's mommy's Escalade catch that. She will be kissing your rear view mirror.

One more thing to worry about, what will the other mothers think when you drive up in this gas guzzler, other than the fact that you could care less about what they think. Well no worries. I have looked into the future and it seems bright for you with the strong possibility of a Lamborghini Estoque Hybrid; what now PTA moms.

CISWIDHFW (Cars I See When I Drive Home From Work)

Granted it was dark out, but that's never stopped me before. Lets just say I'm good at noticing things specifically to do with a cars exterior. Example: I was with my mom and we were leaving my cousins Christmas party it was dark as pitch outside. A car pulled out of its drive way and went down the hill in front of us, judging by the tail lights i said with 95% certainty it was a Volkswagen Jetta, my mom's reaction was and i quote "What the hell!" She didn't question it either cause she has no idea about cars, and I've been this strange for awhile, so she's kind of used to it.

I was driving home from work one night this last week or so, and I was turning on to Losey Blvd. and there she was-- granted its not what I would have wished for-- but in La Crosse you can't get to choosy. So she turned right in front of me, and I turned in behind her and followed closely for miles (stalker) I can't help it (drooling on my steering wheel the whole way)(until I had to turn off at my street). She is the closest car I will get to an actual Bumblebee Camaro, she was a 2008 Dodge Challenger. Which looks surprisingly like...you guessed it a 2010 Chevy Camaro. Any die hard Camaro fanatic will argue this point with me, which is OK, because i completely agree, the finer points of their body work do look different. But if your my mom or anyone with similar less experience with cars, and about 20-30ft away you'd swear its the same car. I know I've seen far away pictures and I can deduce the same notion.

Yeah they even look different from here, but I do see some similarities and I blame Dodge for that.

Update: Another Convertible

When you saw the summer blockbuster movie Iron Man-- (i assume everyone in their right mind saw it because it's awesome)-- you don't have to be overly observant to have noticed one of Tony Stark's many super cars, the one he drove the most was the Audi R8. If you haven't guessed the subject of this post yet, well guess what, the Audi R8 went topless.



Yes indeed and not a Targa top either as many had thought, but in actuality a fabric top was chosen. Several sections of the original car were converted in order for the convertible-ness to happen, they include a new engine cover, the fuel cap being moved from the side pillar of the car to the rear panel on the same side, and new design lines cut into the side panels. Another area of the car that has been changed are these two side intakes called "side blades" which were removed to make the storing the top an easier feat. This topless beauty will be available March 2009, same as my other Convertible update candidate, you know who, the Bugatti. But in the US the date is being pushed back to mid 2010. Also depending on how this convertible does they will later put a V-10 into it... sweet.

Any-who, for those sad people that can't visualize what this "change" will look like here are your before and after pictures courtesy of Me.

Before--See the "side blades?"--After

Update: Convertibles

If anyone has by any chance been keeping up with my blog, or has ever glanced at it they would realize that i am a sports car enthusiast, and that my dream car is a Bugatti Veyron. On the subject of Bugatti Veyrons, i am reminding everyone that there are est. 325 in the world, and not all are up for sale. Many other similar minded people like myself think there should be more of them, or more varieties, of the original scheme. The current flavors being the Pur Sang, Fbg par Hermès, Sang Noir, and now the new one is the Grand Sport. The unique feature of the Grand Sport is that its an answer to a request posed by current Bugatti owners, they want a convertible super car. So they got one.

The roof is a hard top, polycarbonate, see through, removable masterpiece. Also known as a Targa top, because only a section of the roof is removable while the roll bars stay in place. The Grand Sport has no roll bars because there is no need, the car is already built with its high-mount carbon-fiber intake valves which stick out farther then the rest of the car anyways. So if by some act of God you do feel the urge to roll your $2.4 million dollar vehicle, just know that the air intake valves of your engine will be their to protect you.

The specific car seen in the picture was put on display at the Pebble Beach Concours weekend auction in Monterey. It went for $3.2 million and all the proceeds from the car sales that day go to the Pebble Beach Company Foundation.

Some other changes that can be seen in the Grand Sport includes a tweaking of the carbon-fiber monocoque, basically they made the chassis stiffer, to with stand the whole not having a roof and going really fast thing. With the top off the top speed is sadly reduced to 224mph instead of its amazing 253mph, but hey it's still the fastest convertible in the world. More changes include a higher windshield, different LED headlights, and a new style for the rims called "horseshoe."

So what happens if your driving in your worlds fastest convertible and the sky starts to rain on your parade, well of course Bugatti thinks of everything. How about a limited use soft top, according to Bugatti just store it in your truck like an umbrella. Now Bugatti fans, they are building 150 Bugatti Veyron Grand Sport vehicles, but the first 40 are reserved for the current Bugatti owners. So if we add 150 to the 325 already floating around we get 475 Bugatti Veyrons in the entire world (whether or not their available still remains to be seen). If you by chance want a Grand Sport issue of the Bugatti Veyron you can expect it to run you about $2.1 million dollars, and be available March 2009, happy hunting.